Life..

Sometimes i marvel how life can turn out to be like..

My indon helper will be leaving on Sunday for good after working for us for 2.5 years. It's really saddening to realise that the day has finally came. She has been staying with my in laws since Tuesday and the boys and i have been missing her sorely. We are so used to having her around..

Our new Filipino helper is here on Tuesday itself too. Indon helper managed to teach her a thing or two but of course, most of the teachings will still depend on me.

I really didn't expect that our indon helper departure would hit Shuoze so badly. I thought didi would be the one but guess i'm wrong. Sz was crying and crying, begging me to ask her back, forcing me to make phone calls to her so that he could talk to her and persuade her to return and even told the new helper that he doesn't want her. He only wants his old auntie. Don't want new auntie. His sobs were heart wrenching.

At such a young age, he knows the meaning of separation for good. He knows how to value a good relationship/ friendship. He knows what love is. Seeing him cry like that made me cried too. But after seeing me crying together with him, he actually told me not to cry, saying big girl girl doesn't cry. Then i told him that if only he stops crying, i would stop too. That was how the crying episode ended a couple of times else he couldn't stop no matter how hard he tries. He was only able to stop for a few seconds before his eyes got teary and the crying would start all over again.

Sigh.

My poor boy.

As for didi, he hasn't been eating / drinking well since she left. At night, he'd wake up more than 5 times crying. Guess didi isn't able to express himself well enough yet. He only calls out to her in the mornings after he wakes up. Today, i actually had to force him to eat using a cane! Or else, he wouldn't even wanna eat.

Sigh.

As for myself, i had already cried the moment she told me she was leaving for good. Unbelievable right? Is there any employer who cry when her helper leaves? If you haven't known any, now you have. So silly isn't it??

But the thing is, she was closer to me than my hb is. She was my friend. My gossip kaki. My confidante even (at times).

I see her everyday for 24/7.

Let just say we share quite a lot of common interests/ interesting conversation eg: good food, my silly crushes (i would go all excited telling her my new found crush!), clothings, slimming plans, women's dressing on the street (yeah, that too! :P) etc.

And now, she will be out of my life just like that. After 2.5 years. And i cannot accept it. A gf said this to me, "hunz, that's life. There are a lot more worst cases out there" which i don't know of obviously.

I guess i'm too protected sometimes, not having exposed to the world since i got to know hb when i was 19. I do wonder how cruel life can be at times too.. but i don't think i would like to experience it myself though and i guess this helper-leaving-for-good experience is just one teeny weeny part of life that i should learn to live with.

And you know what? I hate it!