ARGH!

I'm so gonna KILL myself!!

I can't believe i missed the calls after waiting anxiously for a week now. Ugh!!!!!

For the past 1 week, whenever the phone rings, i will be praying it would be it but it wasn't. I have almost forgotten what it feels like to be waiting for a very important phone call. You know, almost the same feeling when you are waiting for your new found love or rather, the boy that you like but not yet together to call you that kind.

Yes, from time to time, i'll check if the phone is working alright or keep picking up the hp to see if i have missed any calls. I also took my hp and house phone everywhere, to the room when i'm making the boy sleep which i never do, to the toilet when i'm showering, to my bedside table when i sleep at night with the ringing mode on, to the playground in the evening when i usually don't bother. Basically, everywhere and every second. Sad right?

Well, i simply can't help it. You see, my old helper has expressed her interest to return to work and she kinda confirmed it with me before she moved to a place a week ago. Told her to call me when she settles down because she still didn't know where her family and her will be staying yet. Uh huh, no hp or phone number to keep in touch at all. I'm so unsettled by these especially when i desperately want her back at all cost.

So, last Saturday she called, but i was in the cinema watching James Bond. The conversation was kept short as i didn't want to disturb others with me asking her to call back the next day but she didn't till tonight at 11pm. I reckon she has her difficulties in phoning me since she has no handphone and perhaps, the place she's at has no landline as well.

I really really really regretted for cutting the conversation short you know. Sigh.

And just now, when i checked my hp, my heart almost sank to the floor when i saw 2 missed calls from no number. How could i have missed it?? I was in the car when the calls were being made to me. Why no one heard it rang? Hb, my new helper were in the car as well, on the way home and both kids were sound asleep. So, it wasn't noisy at all except for some pianist playing away in the radio but no one heard it? Sigh.

Was it my bag? Sound proof?

Sigh.

Fate.

I really kena played until very ugly this time. Sigh. I really can't wait for her to come back to work again. Everytime i see my new helper, i would wish the old one quickly comes back -- yes, everytime, so it's definitely more than 5 times a day--. I can't stand it anymore. Now i really truly understand why everyone keeps saying, good helpers are very hard to come by. I never knew but now i know.

Sigh.

I'm gonna go insane if i have to wait for another week for her to call.. Think i'm already half way there :P

So please please please, call tomorrow and be answered.. by me :(

Double sigh.

p.s: i have just increased my hp volume to the max, to make sure i'll never miss any calls again from this moment onwards