What defines you?

I've just finished reading 'The Undomestic Goddess' by Sophie Kinsella few moments ago.

Somehow it got me thinking. Would i give up a successful career over love if i'm not married? What do i really want? Do i have a goal? What defines me? Have you asked yourself these questions before? I had and i'm doing it again. Funny though, because my answers became different.

When i was younger :

1. i wanted a career, a successful one which enables me to feel empower.
2. with a successful career, comes money automatically. Lots of them.
3. material needs fulfilled.

I would define having a good life with a successful career, my very own designer condo, car and a pet. Men? What's that? :P

After my marriage and my firstborn :

1. i still wanted a career. A successful one too. I thought of achieving that after i'm 30 when the kids have grown up a little.
2. my family.

Recently :

1. my family.

Without my hb and kids, i am empty.

What happened to career? I guess i just don't want them anymore even though i would love to experience working life very much. I realised i will be needed indirectly even after they've gone to primary school and secondary school. I know i've always wanted my mom to be there but she got busy working. Not her choice.

So now that i have a choice, i will stay at home and be there for the kids. Teenage years are the trickiest part. That's when children really change. To the better or worst. And i wanna be there for them. Since i'm already a mother, i might as well be good at it completely. I realised that everything that i do, i'm only 'half bucket of water full'. Drawing, cooking, baking, make up and even shopping [i'm not entirely crazy over shopping, maybe only 70%?]! Never had i filled up completely. So this is it. Something which i want to be done to the fullest.

Money. I don't wanna be filthy rich anymore. Rich spells problems and more problems. Comfortable is good enough. Comfortable enough to send the kids to enrichment classes, have our own home [i'm fine with staying in HDB], car (a Honday Odyssey will do), holiday once or twice a year etc. This, we are still working on it coz we're definitely not in the 'comfortable zone' yet :P

Material needs. Do you know i do not own a single branded item and have not [besides my Gucci sunglasses which was a gift from hb during woo-ing period] owned one before? Shock? Yeah.. for a girl like me, coming to 26 years old and i never had a branded bag nor wallet before. Somehow, i don't feel the need to have them unless i'm driving a Beemer. Most times, my purse contains less than $50 so, it would be really embarrassing if i were to carry a LV wallet with only a couple of dollars inside wouldn't it? *bleah* But of course, this doesn't mean that i dislike branded things ok? If i have the means to own them, bring it on! But they are not a must to have in my life.

Conclusion : I am what i am because of my family. They defined me. Yes, sacrifices have been made but me ain't gonna whine about it, at least.. most times i wont. Lol. You can call me silly, unambitious, 'what has got into you?' ... i don't care anymore because it's worth it.